Why God allows you to be broken many times

GodLADIES, here’s a fact: Before you reach your 30s, you would be meeting different types of men. Some of them are actually your own preference – they are on your list of standards. You flirted with some of them too, and you might even have fallen in love with few of them at some point. Either way, you would realize they are all douche bags. Which is your ex?

1. Drinking buddies – This was the guy you met when you were drunk or when he was drunk or… whatever. You’re only attracted with each other when you’re both under the influence of alcohol, anyway. He doesn’t ask you out for dinner or somewhere in broad daylight. Do you want to know why? Because if he gets his way with you anytime, why would he bother to still exert effort? Ditch him.

2. Mr. Barumbado – Most of us women are easily attracted to the “barumbado” style, probably because we drooled over Robin Padilla and his charming style of pursuing women. We see temperamental guys to be appealing – it’s usually our basis of masculinity. But the mere fact that they can be violent to others, what makes us think we could be an exemption? We are perfectly aware that they could be physical, still we challenge ourselves hoping we could change them – weird huh? Maybe some women are really just dominating, we want to prove that we can tame the wild ones – too bad for men, women measure men’s love by how they submit and comply to their girlfriend’s ground rules and when things don’t go as you have foreseen it, you decide to call it quits because now you can’t stand staying with someone forever as temperamental as he is.

3. The committed guy – There’s a part of us women that really finds thrill in guilt feelings. We gotta admit – we like competition – and if we can prove that we could win any guy we want even if he is committed – it’s a trophy. Again we challenge ourselves until such time we can no longer get out and when you get your heart broken only then would you realize (hopefully) that you don’t deserve to be an option; you deserve a single man in your life.

4. The good looking – Who would resist having a good looking campus crush boyfie? No one, because we all want to have good looking offspring don’t we? But why do women keep on throwing themselves on these players when they know they could just be the flavor of the month? They see their flaws, tendencies and untoward attitudes yet they choose to ignore them and when these guys leave them for a much good-looking girlfriend, nagtataka pa sila?

5. The intellectual – Women love intelligent men. Someone they can be proud to introduce to their friends, but if you still haven’t noticed by now, most of these intellectual men are conceited and eccentric. They can afford to embarrass you just to prove they are right. You’ll never win an argument with them and so you would always have to swallow your pride because they can never be sorry for their decisions. They would always treat and make you feel like a dummy. You’d realize attitude is still much important than intelligence when you get fed up with such a man who has very high regard for himself.

Our ideals at times can cloud our judgments. Truth is, sometimes it is us who lead ourselves where the broken heart goes. We choose to be like that sometimes. And when you feel you’ve had enough of these men you would ask, “Why does God allow me to bump into these morons?” It’s simply because it’s what we want, it’s what we think would make us happy.
God allows us to meet different men in our lives so we could realize that what we want is not what God wants for us. The very person God has planned for you is usually not your type. He is not a rocker; he could be mushy actually. He doesn’t speak eloquently but he is very sensitive. He is not as intellectual as how you want him to be but he is very polite. He may not be a doctor or engineer but he is hardworking. He may not be rich but he loves you and you know he would do anything to give you what you need. You are not even physically attracted the first time you two meet but you are the most beautiful woman in his eyes. In short, he is the exact opposite of what you have been dreaming of, that’s why God doesn’t introduce him yet to you because no matter what HE does, you would still insist meeting those morons because he has given us free will.

Stop running through your list of standards in finding The One. You’re gonna end up with the opposite anyway. Instead of checking if the guy you’re dating meets your qualifications, check if you are meeting the standards of an ideal girlfriend first. Bago ka maghanap ng boyfriend material, make sure you are girlfriend material din muna ha ne?
I’m not saying here you lower your standards but if you are still single, maybe they need a revisit. What do you pray for? Someone rich and good-looking? Maybe it’s high time to elevate your standards by praying for someone respectful and humble and loving.
Just saying.•

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Columnist at Headline Gitnang Luzon | Radio Jock 95.1 FM/ Event Host | melodramatic fool |wannabewriter | toy collector