‘The Weeping Portrait’

IMAG0022Allow me to begin by stating that I do not share common issues with Filipinos like some of the foreign persons whose forums I have read.  I also would like to state that I have no desire to date or engage with any Filipino socially lest they desire contact, though friendship is all I can offer.

I became interested in the Philippines nearly three months ago because I am in search of an off-site location in hopes of successfully expanding operational production while trimming overhead costs. Naturally, China was the first locale I had in mind, though I am not particularly eager to share the intricacies of my design with any outside parties. I was planning a two-week stay, traveling to various locations in order to find a situation adequate for my needs. While this might seem naive to some readers, I assure you that all the necessary proclivities have been previously arranged by an outside party.  The overhead costs of conductingg business in the Philippines is relatively inexpensive by contrast, even with the extra necessary off-book expenditures not commonly budgeted for in some other countries.  So, economically the Philippines would be an ideal place to start my dream to one day view ten zeros behind a solitary number in my business account.

I, being a person with a business background realize that costs, while important, are not the only mitigating factor when important business decisions have developed acceptable form.

I feel I must state, that as an outsider, I have difficulty understanding the behaviors of the foreign-born men either visiting or repatriating in this country.  From my personal research committed to self education of the Philippines, I discovered personal commentaries concerning mounds of trash and other undesirable items, littered throughout certain areas within the country. This fact, in my view, highlights a general disregard for personal responsibility, though I may be incorrect in my assumptions.

Many preconceived aspects viewed from a distance, may differ radically to onlookers when perchance they are close enough to decipher hidden attributes that were previously unclear. From such a distance, the Philippines does not appear to be the best place to invest both capital and time for reasons that overshadow the projected bottom line.

If it is not a bother, I would like to request opinions from both persons foreign-born and natural-born citizens as to why they believe it would be beneficial either to approve an investment or to avoid the Philippines altogether?

I personally feel that I must address comments that I came across while attempting to further understand the Philippines and its citizens through reading a blog. I can understand that for certain individuals, carnal relations rank high in levels of importance. I practice a measured approach which suits my lifestyle. Personally, I have difficulty understanding the dedication of others by way of time and logistics for such a task. I can accept that people are individuals whose focus differs on a personal basis; It’s a personal fault as I often attempt to gain perspective in various aspects of life that I find intriguing. I am neither judging any persons nor do I desire a shifting in their behavior as it does not concern me. I only point this out because of the resounding and repetitive demonization by expatriates or visitors aimed at the behaviors of the native Filipino women.

I have a friend,I’ve known for years, who was born in Mindanao, and I have yet to observe in her the behaviors that have been associated with the greater majority of the Filipino populace. Perhaps, she does not posses these traits because she her family left for the states when she was still quite young.

If the claims made by the community of foreigners are for the most part truth, I believe it speaks volumes about the true character of the Filipino people who I have presently yet to behold.  I have observed in many cultures the similarities to my own and others full of vast differences. An outsider who fosters assumptions about another cultures habits are likely to do so because there is a lack of understanding in a lifestyle counter to their own. I hope this is the case for the many disparaging claims I have heard about the Filipino community at large.

I understand that many of the people in the Philippines are of low economic status.  I will not deny that this predicament is a driving force behind certain behaviors both good and bad, though mostly bad.  I have personally witnessed first hand some of the most unforgiving actions caused by widespread poverty. Mostly, I can identify with the desperation elicited through behaviors counter to one’s personal belief structure and instilled courtesies learned through proper rearing.

I am certain that I do not need to remind Filipinos of a historical fact, though for those unaware, I will; for the better part of the past millenia, Filipinos have been mired by the occupation, denigration, and arrogant plots of extermination by outside forces. That truth in my opinion, would affect any culture through certain positive and negative adaptive traits.

From what I have read, the behaviors cited by foreigners associated with Filipino women, are characterized by an affinity to fabricate stories to suit their goals in hope of eliciting monetary gains, mostly from unknowing outsiders a fair distance away.

The stories I have read claim the women were quite disingenuous and callous to the unsuspecting persons on the other side of the computer or phone.  I came to understand that the greater majority of Filipinos are Catholics, and in Catholicism from what I have recall, values such as faith, belief, and character are important in ones life.

I will not instruct a person on how they should live their lives, but personally I would feel disgusting, we’re I to engage in trickery and deception whilst proclaiming to be someone of good morals in faith and life.  I was not raised as you were, so I do apologize if it seems as though I judge, it is not my intention. I only find it abhorrent when persons I know misrepresent themselves and find that complete dissociation from that individual is necessary as they can never be trusted because they lie to themselves.

I found many articles attesting that some Filipinos attempt to bleach their skin, desirous of a fairer skin tone.

I cannot understand how a person or persons who perform this task, could do so unless they dislike who they are either phenotypically or psychologically, and personally I don’t know which is worse.

This knowledge allows for a clearer view of the plight of the citizens of the Philippines. I am told that this practice is not performed by all, but there are enough people doing it, that I was able to read about it online.

I am to understand also that many men avoid responsibility and choose rather to enjoy playful existences far into adulthood. I will not comment on this as I don’t posses all the facts. The most successful among Filipinos, I have found, are those who decidedly leave the country and settle elsewhere. I am sad internally for the plight of your people and hope that further reason will flood the minds of those with the will and opportunity to guide or aid others toward a positive change that will enrich and elevate all Filipino life to a brighter future.

I again will not advise anyone to shape their life or to feel defensive about the things I write as I am ignorant to many facets of the Filipino people.  

I have been told that many Filipino women are desirous of gaining the attention of adorned caucasian men for personal relations and hopes for a union through marriage.  This was troubling; I wonder if any Filipinos have knowledge of Stockholm syndrome. It is a disorder, most often associated with kidnapped individuals, where the abused or affected individual begins at some point to identity with the person or persons attacking or hindering them and accept or at times favor their subjugation.

I say that to present the apparent paradox, in that the same people who caused various difficulties for Filipinos over a considerable length of time are now the ones looked to for salvation. It’s only my observation, but a very troubling notion if that is the case.

If one would have read certain comments I have they would necessarily conclude that the Filipino people are viewed as a product by some people, similar to an item one might purchase at a store; an item to be bought and used and disregarded at the purchaser’s pleasure.  If the Filipino people notice this as I have after very little research, it would be a travesty that this is condoned.

Yet, another item of discourse I do not understand is the alleged disdain toward Filipinos who have a darker skin tone. The same disdain is said to be reserved for those of Indians and Africans, or I suppose any persons who are dark enough to merit ridicule. I have an issue caused by the inability of understanding how a dejected, disliked and subjugated people in many circles would practice an equally ignorant philosophy that dictates somehow that skin tone or geographical/ancestral traits signifies people as lesser beings; because of the circumstances of their birth, a matter in which they possessed no choice and are incapable of changing, becomes the cause for being maligned without uttering a word.

If disliking a person based on genetic traits is the attitude of Filipino people, I will pray, an act that I never perform, that the earth destroys the enmity within those who hate their counterparts for reasons of an intellectual defect or worse, an ardent belief in a world that exist only in the minds of those not fit to survive.

All that said, for the foreign men feeling or being used by Filipino women, try to understand their plight and their history. And for the outsiders using Filipinos, I urge you to try practicing restraint from actions you would not favor were they perpetrated on a close relative of yours. Attempt to treat others as you would like to be treated and if you cannot, then I hope that you will someday reap an equal reward to the ones you subject upon others.

This for me has been enlightening in certain regards, but mostly it is rather saddening; the idea that people in today’s world with an effortless ability to access information, remain dissimilar to most of the world at large.

I apologize for any overgeneralization encompassing entire populations as I am sure that everyone there, native and outsider, do not all practice the cited beliefs and actions.

Be well, people, and try to understand that your lives and the lives of all that you know or ever may know, are finite, as is the case for our entire species.

Perhaps, for posterity, humanity might do well to become more tolerant, give respect to others and assistance to those in need if are able.  I am sure that if any persons hates you because you are a good, decent person, they hate themselves far more severely.

Peace to all and may progress light the way out of darkness…..

About J

human seeking better understanding