So I have so many Caucasian guy friends.
Erm, that makes me a whore?
Normally, if a girl with a ‘white guy’ walks around my city, people will have a look at the guy then look at the girl he is with. This is regardless of whether they walk together holding hands, carrying suitcases with secret marked money inside, or if they are really together or they just happened to be walking together with the same strides.
When my friends count the number of foreign – especially Caucasian guys – I have, they all tease me for being an ‘exotic’ beauty. They all think I became friends with them because these guys all have drooling thoughts in their head.
I normally have a simple answer to them (in my own head of course) – “Define exotic beauty.”
In this country, when you say exotic beauty, that’s a borderline between an ape and a beauty queen. No kidding. I’m not trying to be mean or anything, but when my friends define it, it’s confusing. I have to ask them to further elaborate.
When someone is short, flat-nosed, brown-skinned, and puny, one easily becomes exotic looking. Thanks to the advent os skin whitening products, we now have a stereotype within an already stereotyped race.
My friends all think – and I know some of them secretly do and are just shy to admit it – that all these guy friends of mine became my friends because of my, well, looks.
Fine, I am not really super brown-skinned, and I am tall (5″ anyone?) . I wear glasses (or contact lenses when I feel like it), and I have extremely black hair that the salon people had to dye twice when I wanted to color it brown.
I know for a fact that compared to my girl friends, I am never a fan of foundation, lotion, eyeliner, lipstick (my most hated make-up thing) and perfume.
But I think my girl friends don’t give me the credit I deserve.
Point 1: Have they seen my Caucasian lady friends? Maybe they were too focused on my hot male friends, they have overlooked the hot lady friends I have in my Facebook account.
Point 2: Don’t I speak to these guys? As far as I know, most of them became my friends because they learned what’s inside my head, not my jeans.
Point 3: Are my girl friends friends with me because I am exotic looking? I don’t think so.
So do I hate my friends who stereotype? No. Friends or not, I’d hear the same thing anyway. This simply my take of my society.
Sometimes, it easily passes judgement against another that when I hear people crying ‘racism!’ from somewhere, I cringe. All because these people, too, pass judgement to their own kind.
I have a friend, who has a Filipinamother and a half-Irish, half-American Dad. When his parents moved to the States, his mom had a hard time telling people that she was not a hooker from Pampanga(Another stereotype I learned: Pampanga is allegedly the melting pot for hookers and the hooked. This simply is not true.) That they met in UP, the premium university of the country, and that they did follow the pathways of falling in love, genuinely.
Nope, not in Australia, but take note-here in the Philippines.
I know not everyone is like that. But it pains me, being one of the common victims, that cross-cultural friendships are secretly doubted in this country.
True, we are a “happy-hello-foreigner” type of country, but the truth is, not everyone is ready to jump into the void and be real friends with other races. Are we hypocrites that way? I don’t know. You be the judge.
author: manila citizen
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