P49 Deceived and Betrayed by a Spineless Coward

Deceived and Betrayed by a Spineless Coward

Tommy’s defense and my response continued:

Being cheated on, Trudy did confront Guy via email. And there ensued between Guy and Trudy acrimonious exchanges. At first, I did not know that Trudy was communicating with Guy. For the prime reason of hurting Trudy, Guy sent Trudy all details, pictures and videos of our affair and published it over in FB for all our relatives and friends to read. Guy fabricated most facts just to make Trudy mad. Guy even sent more than 300 emails. At this point I learned about Trudy and Guy’s exchanges.

The reasons why I side with Trudy are:

– Guy, in her messages made public, completely distorted the facts of our affair by showing that it was me who pursued and deceived her;

– I wanted Guy to stop publicly humiliating me and my family through social media and emails, especially with lies and facts distortion;

– Guy did not stop her publicity despite my lawyer and Region Police’s request for her to stop doing so; and,

– most important, it was Guy and I who made Trudy angry and Guy is further hurting my children.

The only reason for this claim is that Guy wanted to hurt Trudy whom she despises and that I did not say good bye to her personally.

Trudy did not only confront me thru email, but also thru texts, phone calls, and FB messages as evidenced from when the affair was found out on Jan 4 2015.

I ignored all of Trudy’s bashings. The only time I responded to her texts was when she pleaded to me on Jan 14 2015. I only responded when I made her promise to deal with me in a civil way. I thought she was pleading on behalf of Tommy that she’s willing to share him with me. How pathetic of me to think about that. She became acrimonious that’s why I ignored her again.

Trudy did not stop bothering me thru texts and phone calls from then on again. On Jan 19 2015, she’s texting me the acronyms and the terms that only Tommy and I could understand and the intimate details of the affair. He should not say that he did not know that she was communicating with me. Why would she know about the details of the affair? They’re ganging up on me. They’re both humiliating me. They even said that a lot of men had me. To them I am just a bug to be crushed. They belittled my existence. This set me off. I responded. About 4 hours of hate text exchanges transpired.

If Tommy did not know that Trudy was communicating with me, why would he allow a picture of both of their hands one on top of the other wearing their wedding rings be taken and sent to me to rub on my face with a subject “Eat your heart out”?

I had no intention of hurting Trudy further. Ruining her family and her marriage was hurtful enough. I don’t know if there’s a greater pain. I gave them peace and quiet for 36 days. I would have stayed quiet, but because of their horrible actuations, I was forced to send all the details of the affair to her. I wanted to tell her and prove that I was deceived to have this affair consummated. That’s my only reason. I wanted her to stop bashing me as there’s no truth in what Tommy had been telling her just so he could get away with all this unscathed. I even emailed Tommy first before I sent the evidences to her, but he just ignored such email. But despite my evidences, she said that what I had been telling her were just my illusions and even threatened my CGA designation.

The affair was published on FB only on May 5 2015 in response to Trudy’s challenge to have a show. I emailed Tommy about this before I did it, but he just ignored me again.

Tommy should prove that there’s any fabrication to my evidences.

It’s not only after I published the affair on FB that Tommy knew about what had been transpiring between me and Trudy? He knew about it from the get go and he just let everything unfold in front of him. When Trudy found out about the affair, he just hid behind her like a scared little boy, and he let her clean up his mess. There wouldn’t have been a mess to clean up had they left me alone.

Tommy and Trudy could have stopped me anytime from the moment I emailed Tommy on his work about my plans. They just had to reach out to me and let us settle this mess amicably. But instead, they lawyered up to further harass me and even reported me to the police. They were the ones who fabricated their stories to the lawyer and to the police.

Had Tommy not deceived me to have this affair consummated, had he accepted the very first time that I broke up with him, before his son found out, before Trudy found out, there wouldn’t have been this so much hurt to Trudy and their children.

The only reason for this claim is that Guy wanted to hurt Trudy whom she despises and that I did not say good bye to her personally.

The main reason for my claim was because of Tommy’s deception. Had there been no deception, there would never have been an affair. Had there been no affair, there would never have been those expenses.

Tommy should prove that I wanted him to say goodbye to me personally for I never wanted that. All I wanted was peace and quiet. I gave them that even though Trudy kept on bashing me. It was okay if he broke up with me thru text and hoped that I understand him and hoped that it be our last communication. It was okay if she bashed me no end thru all means – phone calls, texts, FB messages, and emails – for she could easily be ignored. It was okay if they ganged up on me to humiliate me. It was okay if he just made my life miserable from when she found out about the affair. All I wanted was peace and quiet, but they did not want me to have that.

I have never despised Trudy. How could I despise someone who’s excellent in bringing up her kids and who knew from the get go what she wanted?

I don’t despise Trudy now even though I almost took my life when she communicated with me underhandedly as Tommy in the Dearest Guy email exchanges. That’s her way of dealing with her pain. I destroyed her 20+ years of marriage. I ruined her family.

Who I despise is Tommy. He threw away his wedding ring to prove that he’s going to separate from Trudy. He bent backwards to prove that we’re exclusive. He made me do things that I have never done before and I allowed him to do things to me that no one had done to me before. He made me his whore. He did all the crying and begging so I would not leave him. He brainwashed me thru phone calls, voice messages, texts, and emails that what we had was forever. He convinced me that we’re starting our happily ever after by praying so many times every day. He made a promise to my dad 12 hours before he passed away. He held me up so high on such a breakable thread. I thought so highly of him that I was even willing to wait for him when he’s ready. He broke up with me thru text. He narrated to Trudy all the intimate details of our affair that I held sacred. He saved himself by pinning the affair on me and ganged up with Trudy to humiliate, harass, threaten, taunt, and play me. He allowed my CGA designation to be threatened. He didn’t do anything when he knew that Trudy had been communicating with me underhandedly many times as him and other people. He lawyered up and reported me to the police with fabricated stories. I had to sue him to find out that what we had was all lies.

The entirety of our 3-year affair was a complete lie and deliberate deception to secure unfair gain. I could have sued him for fraud.

Oct 13 2015

The dreaded hearing has come. I requested for a telephone conference. No matter how I’d composed myself, no matter how I practiced, just like in lamaze class when I was pregnant with my eldest, it was all for nothing. In my lamaze class, I practiced breathing and concentration for months and when it was actual, my painful screams were heard 2 floors down. For my preparation for the hearing, I watched all the live courtroom dramas and promised myself to be composed. The judge who heard us was a lady. She said that she’s just going to hear about the personal belongings that were in the defendant’s possession and that if he could not return them, I should be compensated for those. Tommy thought that I’d be there that’s why he brought my personal belongings that survived from Trudy. I got so upset with him. My blood was boiling. This was what I was thinking:

(Why did he have to let me sue him? Why couldn’t he just mail me those? He let me go thru the agony of suing him and all the while he still have all my stuff with him. It took me months to prepare my claim. Nasayang lang ang pagod ko. What’s his intention of keeping them? To bury them again just like what he did with my love letters way back in the 80’s when I broke up with him for the second time?)

The judge asked how much I wanted to be compensated for my belongings. I got my original claim and mentioned the amount and added that even if the defendant paid me, how would that correct what he’d done to me? I was not actually asking for reimbursement. I just wanted him to apologize to me. The judge said that she cannot require the defendant to do that. And then later Tommy asked the judge if he could take the opportunity to talk to me.

(For the first time, after Jan 4 2015, after being intimate with me over the phone and after sending me his last text, the break up text asking that it be our last communication when Trudy found out about our affair, I heard his voice again).

Yes, absolutely, the judge replied.

Tommy:  Maybe she wanted some answers. I feel bad. I suffered in silence during those times…

I didn’t let him finish. I didn’t want to hear any of his crap. I was already fuming mad when I found out that my stuff were still with him, and to hear his voice again, with all the drama that he wanted to say, I was really yelling at him. All the composure that I had prepared for went out the window. I was not even listening to him.


The judge intervened saying that the defendant has heard that I was asking for an apology.

Me: Your Honor, I just wanted him to apologize, that’s it. TOMMY, DO NOT SAY ANY ROMANTIC CRAP TO ME!!! JUST APOLOGIZE!!!

(I forgot that what I really wanted from him was to man up to what he’s done to me. I was really furious that I could not think properly. Dito pa lang talo na ako. I was really ashamed of myself. I was not like this…all my pent up hatred towards him for 9 months became just like that…pent up…I broke down and started crying).  I have to sue you, Tommy…

And then he started crying…

Tommy: I’m sorry, Guy, I’m sorry. I had to use you as an escape goat, but…

Me: (Maybe afraid to slide back and fall for him again, I stopped him). You talk to me in private not in court, okay? You have to deal with me properly, Tommy, because you just used me.

Then the judge intervened again because we were both crying. No words were exchanged anymore…just stifled sobs…for quite a few moments…and then the judge asked if I still wanted to be compensated for my stuff. I just told her to ask the defendant to mail everything that I have with him and I’m dropping my claim. I told her no amount of money can undo what he did to me.

I do not know if his apology saying that he used me as an escape goat is manning up. I am trying to convince myself that he manned up. Now I’m regretting that I should have let him talk. But then, for what? I do not know what’s real with him anymore.

Tommy could not man up to anything. And to think that he’s a Corps Commander in his HS. He’s the only one I know who could tell lies and then to have low hanging balls to stand and stick up for those lies. After trusting him for three years, he treated me as enemy, the girl he desired all his life, the same girl he wasted rivers of crocodile tears for, the same girl he deceived so he could consummate the affair, the same girl he deceived to make the affair last long, the same girl he sang countless of love songs to, the same girl he texted with 6,000 times every month, the same girl he talked to on the phone 2,000 minutes a month, the same girl he left countless of voice mails to, the same girl he email exchanged countless of times with, the same girl he used as a respite for 3 years, and the same girl he betrayed the moment the affair was found out.

Tommy really made me fall for him. Who wouldn’t be brainwashed by his phone calls, texts, emails, and voice mails. His voice mails full of his songs:

– When You Say Nothing At All by Ronan Keating

– Forevermore by Side A

– Don’t Wanna Miss A Thing by Aerosmith

– You Make Me Feel Brand New by Stylistics

– I Will Always Love You by Kenny Rogers

– Sa Kanya by Ogie Alcasid

– Hanggang by Wency Cornejo

– Kailangan Kita by Gary Valenciano

– Ipagpatawad Mo by Marvic Sotto

– Ikaw by Sharon Cuneta

– How Did You Know by Gary Valenciano

– Minsan Lang Kitang Iibigin by Ariel Rivera

– Pangarap Ko Ang Ibigin Ka by Regine Velasquez

– Always On My Mind by Michael Buble

– Best Of Me by Michael Buble

– Pasko Na Naman by Ariel Rivera

– Christmas Won’t Be The Same Without You by Martin Nievera

– Maghihintay Sa ‘Yo by Dingdong Avanzado

– Maging Sino Ka Man by Sharon Cuneta 

– Narito by Gary Valenciano

– Forever by Kenny Loggins

– Nothing’s Gonna Change My Love For You by George Benson

– Truly Madly Deeply by Savage Garden

– For The First Time by Kenny Loggins

– Sana Ay Malaman Mo by Ric Segreto

– When I Met You by Apo Hiking Society

– Basta’t Kasama Kita by Dingdong Avanzado

– Kahit Maputi Na Ang Buhok Ko by Sharon Cuneta

– You by Basil Valdez

– Kailangan Ko’y Ikaw by Ogie Alcasid

– Ikaw Lamang by Gary Valenciano

– Love Of All Time by Shakatak

– Ikaw Ang Aking Pangarap by Regine Velasquez

– I Want To Spend My Lifetime Loving You by Marc Anthony

– So It’s You by Raymond Lauchengco

– Yakap by Junior

– Hold On by Neocolours

– Say You’ll Never Go by Neocolours

– Merry Christmas, Darling by The Carpenters

– Nandito Ako by Ogie Alcasid

– Sana Magbalik by Jovit Baldovino

– Starting Over Again by Natalie Cole

– Sana’y Maghintay Ang Walang Hanggan by Ric Segreto

– All Of Me by John Legend

– I’ll Make Love To You by Boyz II Men

One of my closest friends told me that God did not allow my relationship with Tommy to prosper way back in college. Maraming tanong. Malaking panghihinayang. Matagal na panahon ang pinaghintay ko para malaman ang sagot. It took my reputation, self respect, moral values, my family, my whole being at stake and compromised para lang ma realize ko that Tommy is a shit and the most undeserving of even the smallest amount of love that I can give.

I was truly deceived and betrayed by a spineless coward.

The love story that started in Jun 1987 ended horribly in Jan 2015.

If there’s such thing as happily ever after, sadly, it’s not meant for me.

Deceived and Betrayed by a Spineless Coward
Deceived and Betrayed by a Spineless Coward