How did it all come to end? Life is short, full of twists and redicule. As I count the precious few seconds I have left in this world, I saw a flashback of everything I’ve been through so far.
Was my life really worth it? Have I lived it to the fullest?
At the back of my mind there are regrets, pitiful sorrows I cannot bend away. I thought of so many things I still want to do. Perhaps, I only lived it for the sake of surviving but never really lived it to make a mark.
Should I have been more blythe about it, I would’ve been happier and contented, I guess. This may lead into something better, like beeing born anew. I once told myself, the idea of transmigration to an entirely new being is not too bad after all. I have always looked forward to the new life I may live in.
As I pulled my last breath, everything went dark, and then a blinding light guided me towards a door. As I open the door there are two paths, left and right, I was to choose just one. The left door is dark and muddy while the other is clean and bright. I chose the right path for it was easier to to pass by, I can walk right past it effortlessly. As I went on along the way, I told myself, “this is too easy this must be the right choice”.
At the very end of the hall there was a man standing with pill in each of his open palms. One RED and the other BLUE. He said, “This RED pill will send you back to when you were 10 years old with all the knowledge you have today, a chance to correct past mistakes. And the other, the BLUE, will shoot you at the age of 50 in the future with wealth more than you can count.”
“Wow! What an offer.” Without thinking I picked RED. I had way too many regrets that I thought I would correct; a reset of my life. And just that, I was able to re-live my past. I went back to my old school, met with old friends, my old house, people I lost before are here to hang out with and have corrected some past mistakes. Everything is sunny and fun, living the realization of a dream.
This time around for sure, I became successful. I was able to finish my studies, owned a huge house, bought great cars, I got all that I asked for. But why am I missing something, or perhaps, someone. As I go along my “re-lived” life I realize that I may have regrets….again, of the choice that I made.
I asked myself, what could have happened if I picked the Blue pill, what if I chose the dark and muddy path. Why can’t I ever be satisfied…
I choose the Blue pill, and then snap! I woke up. It was all just a dream, a very confusing dream. I stood up, grabbed a glass of water and realized, I can never have the contentment in my life if I go on and regret over the things that I thought I could have done better.
Do not misunderstand me. Regret is a real thing. Regret is a struggle and a torture that can summon up a lifetime of misery. If only…? What if…? Perhaps if I had…?
Regret is real, because like so many other human thoughts, we attach ourselves to it, we make it a part of our persona and we exhaust ourselves mentally by almost becoming it. But while it is real, it is also not real. It is a perspective. And of course perspective can be shifted. Confused? let’s see…
I believe that as little sparks of soul in a human body we are duty bound to shift our perspective. We must take those regrets and alleged mistakes and change them into something else, something more positive. This is true for all negative emotions; fear, sadness, pain, anger, stress, despair, depression and delusion.
We must realize that these negative thoughts and their associated emotions result from our own minds. No matter what terrible choices we have made, or what horrible events have befallen us, we have the choice to grieve for these for the rest of our time here. Or, alternatively we must find a way to cope.
I must admit I found it difficult until I had one of those marvellous moments of insight that come every once in awhile.
I realized I made my decisions based on what was available at the time, that, unfortunately didn’t include a crystal ball. I had no way to see into the future.
Look forward, never backwards. There is no use in wallowing in self-pity and regrets. That does no one any good — especially not you. Learn from your mistakes in life and then move on to the better things that are to come without looking back. You’ll be much happier in life if you do.