Heartbroken 103 : Moving on, moving past

walking awayEach of us have our own way of dealing with our pains. Some may decide to face theirs head-on. I, on the other hand, chose to just put everything behind me.

I know that it was not a wise decision, especially since I can still feel all the anger bottled up inside of me. But at the moment, I don’t think that I have much of a choice, lest I find myself ceasing to function as a person.

 Maybe the hardest part is not knowing why everything ended up the way that they did. Sabi nila, the first step to moving on is acceptance, and the first step to acceptance is forgiveness. But, at this point, I don’t think that I am ready for acceptance, much more, for forgiveness.

 So, eto na ‘yun. It has come to an end. We have come to an end.

Sa dinami-rami ng pinagdaanan natin, sa tinagal-tagal ng pinagsamahan natin, I never thought that we will just end up goiing our separate ways.

 Dati, akala ko, pag mahal n’yo ang isa’t isa, everything will fall into place, na lahat kayang malampasan. Pero mali pala. Sa mga sine at tele novela lang pala nangyayari ang happy ending. Dahil sa totoong buhay, love isn’t everything.

Being in a relationship is being in a commitment – maybe, not of forever, but of a lifetime. No one is perfect.

Sa buhay, marami pa tayong makikilala na mas maganda, mas sexy, mas mabait or mas responsable kaysa sa taong mahal natin. The secret of a lasting relationship is the capability of both parties to resist temptation. And this is where you have failed.

 Loving you never really gave me the assurance that destiny is going to be on my side. And since we never made it until the end, mukhang hindi talaga tayo ang para sa isa’t isa, so hindi na kailangang pilitin, because to continue holding on will just mean endlessly hurting each other.

 Sabi ng ilan, sa text lang naman daw kita nahuli, bakit daw kailangan ko pang talikuran ‘yung anim na taon na pinagsamahan natin, bakit daw hindi ko na lang kalimutan ‘yung nangyari para makapagsimula tayo ulit. Para sa akin kasi, cheating – no matter the form nor how innocent it may seem – is still cheating.

I may still be a long way from totally moving on, but I think that I am way past laying blame.

If there is one thing that I can accept at this point, it is the fact that you have deemed me incomplete. I may never understand your reasons, but even if I do, hindi na nito mababago kung ano man ‘yung nangyari sa atin, hindi na nito maibabalik kung ano man ‘yung meron tayo noon, at hindi na nito kailanman mabubuo ang pamilyang nasira na.

About hashie

I am a woman, a nurse, and a mother who loves to read and to write. I hope that someday, my literary pieces will be enough to make a difference - no matter how small it will be - in a world that is struggling to live in a peaceful way. Please visit and like my page https://www.facebook.com/pages/Hashie/276925455677468?ref=hl