I looked outside the window one fine summer morning and smiled at the greenish view that lightens up my heart.
Green grasses and trees combined with blue skies and blooming flowers are like ambrosia to me.
It always gives me the sweet feeling of bliss.
Then I noticed two butterflies, one of brown and black, the other of violet with a small tint of green, flying back and forth the window.
Yes. They caught my attention.
I ran outside and went near the window but they slowly flew toward the fence.
I had this feeling to follow them for a reason that even I could not understand.
So there, out the fence, of course, I used the gate. I followed them.
They flew inside the little rainforest and I with them.
I was caught with the magic of nature.
I watched as the trees sway in the gentle breeze of summer while the sun shines vividly above me.
We reached the grassy field and the butterflies slowed down.
They played from one flower to another while I took the time smelling the scent of the sweet alyssum.
I missed this. The last time I was here was almost five years ago.
And they went up the little hill of baby’s breath and dandelions.
When I was younger I used to play with dandelions and blow their petals away.
One wish with every blow.
Thinking that those petals will reach heaven and grant wishes.
But doing it now won’t hurt, right?
So I picked one dandelion, closed my eyes, whispered a wish and slowly blew it away.
Then the slight wind blew it up, down and away from the hills.
I thought I almost lost the butterflies from there.
They flew down the other side of the hill and above the narrow and shallow river stream filled with numerous small rocks.
The butterflies reached the other side of the river.
And I? …
I tiptoed on the warm flowing water.
I climbed up the small boulder and was tired from the little adventure.
I lay down the boulder. Looked at the blue sky.
This place… This had been my sanctuary ever since I was a kid.
This small boulder had stood long enough.
Long enough to witness all the laughter I had with friends and the story of me growing up.
“How did I forget this place? Does being a grown-up made me forget who I was before?”
I wish I was a child again. And all that matters is having fun.
I smiled at the sight of a beautiful sky above me, watching the clouds changed their shapes.
I want to stay here forever. It’s like heaven.
Said someone not from afar. A guy, I guessed.
And to my surprise I lost my balance and fell down the welcoming river.
Luckily, the river bed was not as hard as it looks.
I heard a giggle and saw a hand offering me for help.
I didn’t saw his face at first because of the water blurring my eyes for a little while.
Then, I saw him.
Smiling. Handsome as always.
“Here. Grab my hand.” He said while trying to reach out to me.
“What are you doing here?” I asked naively.
“I.. I just came here to spend time away from the city life. I guess I needed a breath of fresh air. And you?”
“Well, I’m doing the same thing. But believe me, swimming is never part of the plan.”
And we laughed as hard as we could.
I haven’t heard that laugh for years.
The kind of laugh that gives me butterflies in my stomach.
And I was laughing like a kid again.
“It’s been a while since the last time we talked, Heather. And I miss it.” He said with a glimpse of truth in his eyes.
“Yeah, me too.” I answered awkwardly while tucking a strand of hair behind my ear.
“I guess this place will always be a part of us.” He sighed and looked away. “After five years… Five whole years Heather, we unexpectedly see each other in the same place where I said I loved you… and I still do.”
Overwhelmed, I just let out a smile to mask the awkwardness.
I don’t even know what to say.
Things are a lot complicated now.
Him with someone.
And me, still soul-searching.
I thought before that every love story is like a fantasy with happily ever after.
I guess I was wrong.
I just looked at him as he walked away from me and out of my life, again.
Maybe this time, for good.
We knew we can’t be together.
How I wish we can still go back to looking at the stars together, sharing our dreams and laughing our heads off.
How I wish he can still caress my hair and kiss me goodnight.
I was left staring out in silence, holding my tears so it won’t add up to the millions of tears this river had put up with.
I never imagined that following those butterflies would give me the possibility to admire the beauty of nature again.
Made me remember things that used to make me happy.
And a chance to know that the only man I loved, still loves me.
But it’s over.