How long can a person endure?
Love is not something that expires, or at least that’s what I’ve been told. Truly, love doesn’t cease to exist. It lives thru rain, pain, thru every drought and every gain. But how long can a person hold on to love if it’s not reciprocated? Does it take five years or more? Well I tell you, it doesn’t just take time to heal. It doesn’t just take time to forget your feelings towards a person.
BELIEVE ME, IT TAKES MORE THAN TIME.
I can say “I’m moving on today.” I can say it again the next day, or next week, or probably next month. But if I don’t work to make it happen, it won’t happen. And then you’ll have a timer and time yourself and you’ll say, “After this year, I’ll be over him.” And then the year passed by, you saw him walking pass by you. You felt a pinch inside. You suddenly can’t breathe. You look at him, and you saw him looking back at you. No one moved. No one said a thing. Until both of you were drowned by the crowd. And then you think and ask yourself, “What did just happen?”
Whenever you see him. Whenever he ignores you. Whenever you do anything for him to notice you. And nothing happened. You’re hurt. Because the truth, you kept hanging on.
You log-in to Facebook, you open your twitter account. You said things really meant for him on your statuses. You give your heart to every words you encode on your status bar. You hit enter and see your words being published. Everyone liked it. Everyone felt it. But sadly, he didn’t. You turned your music on and heard Adele say, “but if I tell the world, I’ll never say enough, ‘cause it was not said to you,” you realize you’re so weak. So scared. So chicken. You’re a coward pretending to be brave, facing everyday like nothing’s wrong. Laughing at every jokes like you’re truly happy inside. And you fight back the tears that wanted to run down your cheeks until your throat hurt.
And then it’s Christmas season again. You feel the breeze hit your face. The scent, the coolness… everything in it seems to remind you of how painful love can be. It’s a cold season, but you’re alone. You long for sweetness from that person. Just a small greeting will do. But he will not greet you. You’ll wait. You’ll expect. But nothing… Nothing on your phone, on your mentions, or even in your notifications.
All I want to say is that if you want to let go, do it yourself, TIME will not do it for you. STOP expecting. STOP waiting. STOP pretending. “Tears are alright,” Prof. Morris Schwartz said. LET GO. Be brave enough to do it yourself. No one but you can do it. It’s your failure, yes! But at the same time it’s your achievement! There are lots of fishes in the sea… don’t forget it.
Photo credit: xspblog.com
- MOVING ON, Day 1: Cutting All the Lines that Connect You to Him - July 24, 2012
- They Say TIME Heals, I Say Otherwise - February 18, 2012