The Cycle

Cycle of Emotions (Phote Credit: Comicvine)
Cycle of Emotions (Phote Credit: Comicvine)

Have you ever felt sad without knowing any reason why you’re feeling that way? That you just want to cry? When you just can’t help but cry? That the tears would just fall like they have a life of their own. And when your friends ask you why you’re like that, you can’t even tell them because even you don’t know and don’t understand your own self?

Have you ever felt so lonely, so cold inside, and so sad. And all you need is a hug from someone who cares; someone who loves you; somebody who will not ask why; somebody who will just hug you tight and let you cry on his or her shoulders; Who will not judge you as if you’re just this freaking moody person with emotions always getting the best of you. You just want someone to not tell you “don’t cry” cause you really need to cry and you really need a hug.

Have you ever had that time when you really really thought you were happy; that you were contented with what you have, with all your friends around, and then at one click of a button, you end up crying without knowing why? Have you ever had that time when you thought you were really really strong then you realize you are still weak and you were just faking everything from the past months. Faking that happiness, making yourself believe you were happy when deep inside you were just blocking those pain, putting them all behind you. Suddenly everything will come back and will make you suffer. Then you will again erase them and make yourself believe you’re happy again. The cycle. The pain cycle.

The question is, will this ever end? Will I ever feel happy? The kind of happy that will reach your heart? The kind of happiness where your past wouldn’t be able to destroy you; when all the painful memories haunts you again. That kind of happiness that will win over the very painful memories of the past.

How can one person get that? Is that even possible?

About dollyciouss

I'm not a good writer. I neither have the perfect grammar nor the widest vocabulary (FIlipino or English). I just write what I feel, what's inside of me, and what I can't say out loud. I express my emotions through writing.
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