Practical Happiness

Lately I’ve been checking some blogs about love stories of an older woman with a younger man relationship.

There I saw some famous personalities which become happy after getting a relationship with older women.  Prophet Muhammad first wife Khadijah, was 40 years old. He married her when he was 25. They had a very happy and loving married life. The genius Croatian pianist, Ivo Pogorelich, who at 22 years old married the love of his life, Aliza Kezeradze, 41. Actor Hugh Jackman is 13 years younger than his wife, Deborra-Lee Jackman. The President of the French Republic Emmanuel Macron ,40 years old when he married his wife Brigitte Marie-Claude Macron, 64. This unusual relationship and age gap isn’t making waves in certain place, but it’s getting a lot of attention in other parts of the world.

I became interested. I want to know if it’s really happening.   

In one of the bloga I saw I  read this: “Since when falling in love has anything to do with age? When two people love each other, there are no barriers that can stop the feeling that connects them. Love is free and no amount of money can buy you love, it knows of no age, so when it knocks on your door, why repress it based on the fact that you are older than your beloved?”

Is it for me?

Having a relationship with a younger man is like an adventure to me.  He was nine years younger than me. I struggled a bit since this is my first younger guy relationship. First, I find it hard to believe that he would like me and not girls at his age. I really struggle but he always made me feel assured that everything is okay. Sometimes I feel insecure about my age and think that he deserves a younger woman. But then I think younger women seem to be a lot more demanding, controlling, nagging, emotional, and jealous and less understanding about men. So I tried the opposite, I tried to be less demanding , I always say to him that I am not controlling him, do whatever he wants to do and I will let him.  I nagged a bit if I saw some unusual thing but in a short period of time only. I tried not to show him that I feel jealous and let him know that I am more understanding than anybody he knows. Even if it hurts me deep inside, I didn’t let him know that I was jealous.  At first, I thought that our relationship was all about great sex and hanging out only but as time went on we developed a deeper relationship. But I was the one adjusting more so I could beat my insecurities. I became sportier. I tried going to gym which I didn’t usually do. I tried biking, jogging, water sport and obstacle courses just to make my body slimmer than before. To be stronger and feel younger. I never would have imagined me doing something like this. It’s amazing.

I have never been happier. He is very sweet. I love the person he is, his crazy thrill for life. Great lover, great friend, he is great in everything. Our romantic passion and sexual connection increased as days passed by. We developed strong feelings for each other and became more attached to each other – something we never planned for.

I realized for the first time in any relationship how free I really felt with him. Being with him were the most exciting days of my life. I really appreciate all that I have with him and was very grateful for the chance to have met someone like him with carefree attitude and higher energy level.  He is so sweet. He is a best friend who reflects back to me what a good person I am, which builds my confidence and self-esteem.  He is more relaxed. I enjoy a confident attitude that he has.  

But all of a sudden my feelings changed towards him. I’m learning to cherish him but I felt he has motives. I realized how different we are. He is more playful. I have different priorities to face and he was becoming more mysterious to me. Suddenly, realized that I could not beat the love he has for his own family, so I offered him space, which he told me he couldn’t find in anyone else. I need to let him go because I didn’t see us going anywhere in the future.

About Emode

I write if I am emotionally sad, I write if am deeply happy. I write if I am in-love, I write if I am angry... I write because I have lots of stories in my mind, I think my emotion is my motivation why I can compose articles, because I write what’s on my mind, what I feel and what I dreamed for…
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