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Of Loving and Hating

About edith joaquin

freelance writer and public relations and corporate communications consultant | Tagalog Romance author for Bookware Publishing, Inc. | born and bred in Manila but a relatively new resident of Dumaguete City, Negros Oriental | passion is writing (OH, YEAH!), coffee, friends, books and food |

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Sabi ng isang nabasa kong quote,  If you hate a person, you hate something in him that is part of yourself. What isn’t part of ourselves doesn’t disturb us. ~ Herman Hesse

Sabi ng isa pa, Hatred is the coward’s revenge for being intimidated. ~ George Bernard Shaw

At ito ang pinakapamoso sa lahat… Beware of fear. Fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate, hate leads to suffering. ~ Yoda

We fear what we don’t know kasi nga uncharted territory iyon. Baka kung ano ang mangyari. We’d be caught unaware and then, not knowing what to do, we will panic and think, what will become of us? We fear ignorance because we do not want to be put in a position that we can’t actually respond well. We attack that fear by allowing ourselves to hate. Because when we start to hate, then it means, for some of us, that we don’t have to like what it is that we don’t know. And if we don’t need to like it, then we don’t need to get to know it. And when we don’t need to get to know it, we don’t need to find out how very different this person, or this situation is from us. And that we are actually helpless to compete. Pwede din kabaliktaran. Masyado tayong kapareha ng mga matutuklasan natin at ayaw nating aminin na may ganoon din tayong pag-uugali.

So how do we learn not to hate?

We learn by accepting. We learn by letting go. We learn by giving. We learn by being patient. We learn by loving.

Difficult? Why? Because again, do we see that by accepting, by letting go, by giving, by being patient, by loving, we are admitting we are weak? That we are losers? That we are lacking in material and immaterial things? That the image we project as forgiving is not what we want others to see? Because to make others see that side of ourselves means giving them the opportunity to hurt us?

But then, sino’ng pwedeng makasakit sa iyo kung confident ka sa sarili mo? Kung mahal mo ang sarili mo? Kung matatag ang paniniwala mong kaya mo lagpasan ang lahat?

Subukan nating pairalin ang pagmamahal sa sarili natin. Mahalin natin sa kabila ng mga pagkukulang, sa kabila ng mga kahinaan. Sabi nga nila, kung ano’ng tanim, siyang aanihin.

Subukan natin magtanim ng kagandahang loob, ng tahimik na pagtanggap, ng pagmamahal. Magiging maganda din siguro ang karma natin. Then I guess, we won’t have to ask the Lord to teach us not to hate but instead, we will ask Him to teach us how to love more.

Hindi ko isinulat ito para i-exalt ang sarili ko. Magagalitin din kasi ako pero hindi ko lang nature ang maging palaaway. Classic Libran. Ayaw ng imbalance. Rurok na iyon kapag nakipag-away ako.

Isinulat ko ito bilang reflection. Na kapag nakakaramdam ako ng nakasisikip sa dibdib na pakiramdam ng galit, baka pwede kong balik-balikan ito para ipaalala sa sarili ko kung paano hindi magalit.

Sana may matulungan din ako sa ginawa kong ito.

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