This year gave me a firsthand experience of how adult dating feels like. In my own words, dating is the art and science of building an interpersonal relationship with aliens that came from Mars–The Men. It is an art because it involves the creativity of self presentation and a science because it needs a strategic analysis on how to play the mind games wisely. And yes, until now, I still consider men as puzzling creatures whom you can’t exactly decipher.
My dating experiences can be considered as priceless adventures. It’s not that I played with or made fun of men, but it’s simply because I enjoyed the whirlwind ride I had in dealing with their different personalities. Let me share to you my experiences of the different guys I met this year.
Note: Their identities were all hidden for the sake of protecting their privacy and protecting my own self from any untoward association I might be judged of.
Alien No. 1: The Guy with Overflowing Hormones.
We are all aware of the fact that women contain more hormones than men, which justifies why women become emotional. But meeting a man who got more of these hormones than you do, and worse, constantly bombards you with his negative thoughts, is basically overwhelming. This guy starts his text with a “hi” and expect his next replies to be an over-all depiction of how his negative world turned out. While I thought we were being dominated by jejemons, there is still a small population of “emos” left in this archipelago. Self-pity is never equal to “pogi points”
Alien No. 2: The Happy-Go-Lucky
While people of their 20’s indulge on how to progress on their careers, this guy has been stuck up with Dota and Counter Strike. Yes, his family may be well-off, but that doesn’t make an excuse for him to be stagnant on a computer game. I need a man, not a boy who’s not even growing up.
Alien No.3: Serendipity Man
When you see a guy a lot of times in the airport terminal, once again in a plane, repetitively by the shore and another instance in a bar, or you have a few friends connected through Facebook, don’t automatically trust it as serendipity. The constant appearance of this man may be logically credited to the small geographical area of the place you are in. I dated this guy simply because I was imagining us to be the Kate Beckinsale and John Cusack of the island. But when the reality of the city arrives, this hopeless romantic picture became clouded with a conscious discretion that love does not happen, just because he’s a familiar face.
Alien No.4: Man in the Danger Zone.
I guess my inclination to extreme adventure led me to meeting a guy with a dangerous personality. I had this curiosity about bad guys and I’m interested on how I can deal with their personalities and so I tried going out with one. Believe me, he’s just one bad guy that I went out with and the experience was traumatic. Why? The moment I met his clan of rehabs, I ran away. The end of the story.
Alien No. 5: Mr. Intellectual
You’ll never win over a Mr. Know-It-All man. The moment you started pronouncing a syllable, he already knows how to complete your sentence. He thinks of your dinner dates as a constant arena of debates. Raise your arguments in a court room, not in a restaurant. “Ikaw na! ”
In meeting these creatures from Mars, I realized that there’s some truth in the saying, “You attract the people who come into your life”. I did not date these guys out of random selection; I went out with them because at 1 point, I shared a common culture with them. The dating activities I had this year made me aware of my values, beliefs and attitudes. Dating allowed me to get in touch with my core and to know myself better. I was surprised on my self-discoveries. It gave me a clear grasp of who I wanted to be and of the essential things that I stand for. My dating experiences taught me the importance of “self-worth”. I guess I have reached the objectives of dating; waiting for Mr. Right is another chapter.
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